For a pessimist, I am pretty optimistic
Current mood : I can hardly describe
Theme song : For a pessimist, I am pretty optimistic by Paramore
Tipsy. Or drunk?
After tasting 14 types of wines at the same time, I was not feeling right.
Okie, before you are gonna brand me as an alcoholic, I have to clarify something here.
#1 - I have not been drinking that much.
#2 -If that was not because of my current job, I don’t think I would even want to take a sip though I felt absolutely terrible.
The last time I was drunk was like 3 months ago. Or more than that?
I seriously have no idea. After that night, I swore to God that I’d never ever want to get so drunk …..
just because of a passerby.
For a pessimist, I am pretty optimistic. I guess so?
Friends thought that I was going to behave like what I did in the past. No worries, pals. I am not who I was. No more drinking. No more crying out loud. No more partying. Life goes on.
Isolated. Alone.
Sometimes, things just happen. Uncontrollably. Unexpectedly.
“ Am I not good enough? Or I can never be good enough?” I asked
“ No. You are good, nice, friendly, outgoing, funny……”
“But why?”
I think Ah Yuan was being a really sweet friend to convince me that I am actually a nice person but things just happened. Well, I am not being upset. Maybe I am. I don’t know.
But I do know I am tired. Sick and tired.
Sick of being the best friend, the special friend, the joke,
Right now, I just wanna be myself.
Photo
Current mood: Oh-so-Ryan-Cabrera
Theme song : Photo by Ryan Cabrera
Okie, basically, http://jeanthedork.blogspot.com is still breathing. No worries, it ain’t dead since jean the new auntie is getting whinier about her life.
Oh damn, why on earth I actually admitted that I am an AUNTIE?
But seriously, I feel OLD. Extremely old. My memory is a very good example. I can actually keep asking the same thing or repeating the same thing over and over again. URGH. Even my friends can hardly stand that.
And I ain’t dead. It’s just that I feel more robotic than ever. Or rather, I live like a zombie everyday. Frankly, working as a 100% OL (Office Lady) certainly gets me. I know I should stop complaining about this. But being desk-chained is like, WOW, killing me. And leading a super boring and dull life as an adult is like, WOW, killing me too. Basically, I don’t feel good at all. Somehow, I miss Shanghai.
I do enjoy working in my current company. In fact, it’s more challenging than the previous internship. It’s just that I feel like an A.D.U.L.T. Friends keep telling me that,
“Oh my god, Jean, you are working like an adult! You are having tasks like an adult. And you are wearing office wear like an ADULT! “
Yes, I know and I am an ADULT. Somehow, I am glad that I chose to have an internship instead of studying like a 100% geek in school. That is because I can finally picture how boring my life is gonna be in the near future. DUH. The truth is
working = no life. Yet, you can’t live without working. And that’s life!
The following is the daily schedule of Jean the boring OL:
5.30 am – Mika is singing “Love Today” so loudly just to wake me up
5.40 am – Snooze
6.00 am – Snooze
It keeps snoozing, snoozing, snoozing till I realize it is
6.50 am !!!
OH FUCK! Why can’t I get up any earlier? Oh damn. Fuck. Shiiiiaaaaaat.
So I just can’t stop swearing and cursing as if it can help me to get everything done any faster.
Then, I take about an hour to get everything done. Sometimes, it takes more than an hour.
Expectedly, I miss the bus and get myself late at work. Seriously, I think the worst employee award of the year belongs to me. How late can I be? Oh, I don’t think you wanna know.
*Claps*
Normally, I start my work at 9.30am. (Erm, if I am lucky enough to catch the bus on time. *ERHEM*)
My robotic routine consists of checking emails, replying emails, making phone calls to the aussie vineyards, updating my supervisor what I have done so far and etc etc etc.
Oh yeah, chatting with my colleagues is one of them. Talking about the chit-chat session, I feel OLD too.
For your information, I am the youngest in the office and I am sure that my fellow colleagues are well aware of this fact. Yet, there was once we (Eh, it’s not “we”. I did not really participate in that convo.) were talking about pregnancy thingy during lunch time and this auntie actually asked me something that I did not know how to answer. Apparently, she asked me something regarding the pregnancy issue.
“…………………………is like that right, Jeanette?”
OH WHY SHE HAD TO ASK ME THAT?
Instead of saying,
“Well, erm, I am 20 yet forever 17 at heart and never experience pregnancy. Apparently, you are a mother of two. Why don’t you tell me that?”
I said,
“H A H A H A. I don’t know leh”
So yeah.
Told ya, there wasn’t any interesting thing happened at my work place. UNTIL ONE DAY,
I had a meeting with a super duper hot looking French guy. He’s just the blonde version of Adam Brody. Oh damn. He’s so sizzling hot that I would not know what’s gonna happen if I tried to lay a finger on him.
Okie, I’d probably melt away. Haha.
That’s the bad thing of having a meeting with a hot dude. You can hardly concentrate.
But I was being really really really professional. Trust me.
Actually,
I was thinking if it would be alright if we could hang out together. HAHA! Oh come on, I got to see so many pretty faces when I was working in the modeling agency. Hence, this absolutely couldn’t be something that I should get so excited about. I think this explains something.
Well, anyway, life gets even more boring after work.
Instead of having dinner, I choose to go jogging sometimes. I have stopped jogging for more than a month. It’s partly because of the ghost month. Superstitious, indeed.
Super duper auntie-ish me.
11.00 pm – Getting ready to sleep and telling myself that I have to wake up at 5.30am no matter what.
SO THAT’S ALL ABOUT MY CURRENT LIFE. INTERESTING, HUH?
I think I really should blog about the internship I had in Shanghai.
Gosh, I miss my friends, especially J.
Shit, that’s another reason why I should give myself a big tight slap on the face.
Alright, I will continue the part 2 tomorrow.
My stamina is bad. URGH.